Mirthful Monday

I have mentioned before how Monday gets a bad rap and most people don’t like it very much. So why not make it more fun? 🙂

Mirthful means jolly or merry and what better to make someone feel that way than to share jokes and humor on the most hated day of the week? I don’t know how to make one of those cute little pictures that say “Mirthful Monday” to which I can make a widget, so for now, I guess I will be without one! Nevertheless, I hereby proclaim Monday’s on my blog as Mirthful Monday!

Enjoy the comedy and try not to dirty yourself too much rolling on the floor. I am dedicating this first Mirthful Monday to jokes about Typos in honor of my fellow bloggers who shake their heads in horror when they see them all around!

1. A daughter sent a telegram to her father about passing her B.Ed(beginning education?) exams, which the father received as ” Father, your daughter has been successful in BED.”

2. A husband, while on a business trip to a hill station sent a telegram to his wife “I wish you were here.” The message received by the wife was “I wish you were her.”

3. A man wanted to celebrate his wife’s Birthday by throwing a party,so he ordered a birthday cake. The salesman asked him what message he wanted put on the cake. He thought for a moment & said”U r getting older but U r getting better”.

The salesman asked “how do u want me to put it?” The man said “..put “U r getting older” at the top & put “but U r getting better” at the bottom.”

When the cake was unveiled at the party, all the guests were aghast at the message on the cake. It read:
“You are getting older at the top, but you are getting better at the bottom”

Morals of the Story:
Double proof read everything before you send.
Don’t trust others to write it right for you.

REAL RESPONSES ON RESUMES:

Education: “Studied public rations.”
Work history: “Faxed documents to attorneys over sees.”
Objective: “To get an opportunity to proof what I know.”
Job duties: “Assist callers and answer heavy phones.”
Job history: “Grocery store catchier.”
Additional skills: “Computers and off ice machines.”
Experience: “Detailed-oriented saleman.”

For more resume errors: Resumania.com

And sometimes typos can come in the form of misleading wording due to bad grammar…..

The following were taken from newspaper ads across the country.

Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops. <—-Ever heard of topless girls? Well, shop here and you will be a Bottomless one!

Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward.
Neutered. Like one of the family. <—-I think I know why this poodle ran away…

A superb and inexpensive restaurant.
Fine food expertly served by
waitresses in appetizing forms. <—-PERVERT!

For sale: an antique desk suitable for
lady with thick legs and large drawers.<—-What does the size of her undies have to do with it?

Now is your chance to have your ears pierced
and get an extra pair to take home, too. <—-Is this some kind of Halloween special?!

We do not tear your clothing with machinery.
We do it carefully by hand. <—-Nothing like that extra special touch….

Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it! <—-I know what you’re meaning here, but I can’t help but feel disgusted at this….

Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.<—-Is there a particular child he isn’t into? Just so I can know what to look out for….

Stock up and save. Limit = One.<—-I assume you stock up by making multiple trips then?

Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first! <—-Honesty is the best policy!

3-year-old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.<—-It’s preferred but when the teacher is only 3, I’m sure some exceptions can be made!

Try us once — you’ll never go anywhere again. <—-Mafia Casino perhaps? or the morgue????

Illiterate? Write today for free help. <—-Sure thing….let me just learn how to write first!

Introducing the Superstore!
Unequaled in size
Unmatched in variety
Unrivaled inconvenience<—-More proof that people need to proofread their stuff!

So I guess you can't fix my door bell then???

Eeks! No shoplifting here!

Another case of "Do what I say, not what I do"

And by our children, you mean adult children, too, right?

We are doomed when Hooked on Phonics doesn't get it right!